Book # 2: The Heart of Anger

Practical Help for the Prevention and Cure of Anger in Children
by Lou Priolo

This was given to me by my aunt, a mother of five well-adjusted and obedient children.  She has recommended other books before, and I have never been disappointed.  This one also proved to be a great resource.

Lou describes angry kids, how parents can provoke them, and how to deal with these attitudes.  He gives extremely practical advice and examples of exactly what you can say and how you can word different conversations.  He also discusses disrespect and manipulation and how in a sense you can "fight" back.

I especially appreciated his use of a "think room", where kids would go when they need to reconsider their attitude.  This is different than time out, as they can decide when they have formed a better way of acting and then can come out and address their parents.  As kids get older, the room would also involve certain tools, a bible and area to pray, in order to help them form better responses. 

The "appeal process" was also a great concept, as it allows children to respectfully petition for a different outcome.  For example, they can ask to clean their room later because of something else that needs done more urgently.  It is a great way for kids to feel that they have an option for changing a rule if they see a reason.  Granted, the child would then comply if the appeal was denied. 

While my oldest is only two and a half, I can still see lots of ways to use the methods mentioned in this book.  I was happy to see that I was already employing some of them, such as working with them to restate things in a respectful manner-- we are in full blown whining mode here!  I think at the point I'm at if I remain consistent, I might not need to use the journals that Lou provides, but I like the fact that they are there if needed.  And his description of the "Gumnazo Principle" is right up the alley of what Orthodox monks practice in giving up their will and training themselves in Godliness. 

So definitely a book I will recommend to fellow parents, and one I will be rereading occasionally to monitor our progress.

And hooray for finishing a book!  I have about four books on hold at the library that if it ever stops snowing, I will be starting shortly.